Jimmy Fallon Asked the Internet For Their Best Quarantine Parenting Hacks and They Delivered
Even though we're all feeling a little bit stir crazy during quarantine, few people have it worse than parents. These brave souls are now stuck 24/7 with their demon offspring, trying to find ways to entertain not just themselves, but also other humans. It's an impossible task. Thankfully for us all, Jimmy Fallon is not letting parents suffer alone. He put out a call on Twitter: how are you handling the quarantine with your kids? Do you have any parenting hacks? Unsurprisingly, the answers are gold. Ranging from actually good parenting advice to instructions on how to hide while your children run rampant and destroy the house, these hacks may not have been what Jimmy expected but they're definitely what he needed. If you're trying to understand how to handle your offspring through this quarantine, you have to take a look at these parenting hacks. Even when they're not practical, we promise you'll laugh.
One of the greatest ways to make sure your children don't irritate you into insanity during quarantine is exercise.
This mom set up a workout in her garage and ran all of her boys through it. Wear them out, then they’ll have no energy to bother you.
You can't just exercise the body though.
You have to exercise the mind. This kiddo and his parent are too wholesome. They’re writing stories together!
Kids can learn all kinds of things!
No age is too young to learn poker right? Especially if you explain how betting works. That’s important to teach ’em young.
You can help your children learn a new skill!
This little one is practicing cooking. She does have a unique take on pasta. I wonder if it gets more flavor when you handle each individual noodle thoroughly?
Some parents let their children learn through experimentation.
This is the “how many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie-pop” of the new generation.
Legos+stairs=maximum foot related danger.
But if you’re brave enough to risk stepping on one of those tiny jerks, this experiment could be pretty fun.
Discovery takes many forms.
And yes, that does include finding the exact perfect spot to nap in the house, even if it’s a little bit unorthodox.
Or maybe you're enlisting some other senses while you help your kids explore.
Taste tests are an experiment right? Especially if they involve candy or chocolate. The best experiments.
Or you could conduct an actual, literal experiment.
This looks incredibly gross, but maybe it will impress upon your children the importance of not leaving food out.
If you want to truly teach them a lesson...
Let them help you with your deep cleaning projects. Welcome to adulthood kids, it’s awful!
Other parents are just giving up and hitting the margs.
If there are Nerf guns in your house it’s time to find a door with a lock and simply hide. There’s no coming back.
Children can be evil.
Can you imagine being locked in a closet by someone who’s less than half your size? The indignity!
It looks like these little ones have taken over.
Their games have no names, but result in destroyed furniture.
In a pair of stark contrasts, this family apparently has "fun" together.
But this actually sounds like an incredibly fun game and I’m writing it down for when I’m allowed to be near my friends again.
A little creativity goes a long way towards good parenting.
Here’s a fun game: create your own clothes only out of things you can find in the house. Hold a fashion show.
You can build out of just about anything.
And in this time of hoarding what better material to use than toilet paper? Fun plus it makes you look incredibly wealthy.
Or you could just be straight up adorable and do something like this.
Small baby plus painting? You may actually have some good memories that come out of this quarantine.
And if your kids are a little older you just have to be creative about placement.
Normal games can happen inside! Sometimes it also will give you a secondary game like “how do I walk down the hallway when it’s full of cornhole?”
Sometimes you just luck your way into strong parenting.
If you joke, and your kids believe you, are you lying? And does anyone care if you’re lying as long as your kids go outside?
Some families have flipped the script.
This little one has taken it into her own hands to make sure her family survives quarantine with enough TP.
Kids are ruling the roost.
This little girl has become the queen of all snacks, and none shall defeat her (because she is strong with snacks).
This child has absolutely no respect for personal boundaries.
And yet somehow he seems to be in charge of bed arrangements. It’s not ideal.
And if your children's creativity isn't coming out in toilet paper rationing...
You can find other ways to let them be themselves. Like this AMAZING dance.
Some parents are turning to their own childhoods for inspiration.
A scavenger hunt sounds like just the solution for antsy kids who need to move their bodies and their brains.
We liked weird things when we were younger.
Do you think we can convince the children of today that they’re still fun? Seems unlikely.
And if that doesn't work you can always get them to provide services for you.
“Do your homework or you have to give mommy a massage” sounds about like my parenting speed.
In some households, the rules have gone out the window completely.
The priority at this point is keeping kids entertained and not crying. If that means riding a mattress down the stairs, then so be it.
Or if you're like this mom, the #1 priority is keeping the parents entertained.
If a kid’s emotions have to be sacrificed then that’s a price mom is willing to pay.
But the strongest families among us come together.
True joy comes from stuffing pillows down your shirts together. It’s not about kids vs. parents.
If you really want to parent in a way that brings you closer, you can teach your kid something.
Or have the kids teach each other, like this older brother teaching his younger brother music. The real hack is that you can get your older kid to parent if you call it “teaching”.
Just don't push your kids too far.
You may end up making a dare you can’t take back, and then you have to stare at a child in dentures for the foreseeable future. Some things you can’t unsee.
Of course these suggestions are all for younger kids.
If you have teenagers, all you have to do is ignore them. They’ve been social distancing masters forever.
You can try to lure them out.
But it will only happen if you do something truly sweet, like reviving a tradition from their youth.
But no matter the age of the children you're quarantining with...
The truest challenge is the great outdoors. If you are firm of will, you can be like this mom and refuse to give in.
Outdoors could be dangerous though.
If your child has athletic prowess do not attempt to sport with them unprepared. Cover yourself in protective garb to make sure you’re safe.
I guess if you're cool like this family you could make outdoors quite an adventure.
But who has maple trees and all the equipment for making maple syrup just sitting around? These people I guess.
But before you go out make sure the kids understand social distancing.
You can use visual aids like Barbies if you need to! It will be everyone’s new favorite game: quarantine Barbie.
Or if you want to take it one step further you can prepare for the inevitable apocalypse.
Build a fort in your living room and show your children how they’ll live in the woods after civilization has collapsed. It’ll be fun!
You could also have a slightly more upscale version of prepping.
Marshmallows and video games? Yes, this is my ideal version of camping thank you very much.
If you don't want civilization to collapse...
You can have your kid write some thank you notes, like this cute little Darth. I think this parent is single-handedly keeping civilization on track.
If all else fails, you can turn to the screens.
Unfortunately that’s what everyone else on the planet is doing right now, which means the spinning wheel of death.
If that happens, one parent suggests going old school.
His hack is to read to your kids. Reading? What is this…reading? I only know Netflix.
Eventually, you'll just snap and turn into this mom.
She just wants the confidence boost of winning at a board game. We all need something during quarantine right? RIGHT?
If you can't have board game success you may start to take a different approach to parenting.
Hide. Call it a game. As long as the kids don’t know you’re afraid, you’re still in control.
There's a reason parents are ending up like this.
What kind of heathen violates the sanctity of shower time? A child that’s who. This is why we cannot trust them.
Is this the height of brilliance or insanity?
Some times it’s very hard to tell, but at least it looks like they’re having fun. Which is truly a challenge right now.
This parent is absolutely brilliant.
Hack your parenting by distracting the children with shiny objects! Then you don’t have to hide, they won’t even pay attention to you.
Some parents are not quite so successful.
Just keep an eye on those teens ok? We can’t have a generation die of infected home ear piercings because of the coronavirus.
And what is even happening here?
Box hide and seek? Box robot? Child death trap?
Ok ok, SOME parents did get truly creative.
This dad let his girl play home salon on him. Dads, protip: be more like this guy.
Oh and this one is brilliant.
If someone had told me a month ago that blowing bubbles indoors would sound like the smartest idea ever, I would not have believed them. But here we are.
I have a big confession to make.
If someone could make an adult version of laundry basket rollercoaster I would likely do nothing else for the entirety of quarantine.
You will need chickens to complete this suggestion.
But if you’ve got chickens, now is definitely the time to give out some chicken baths. I had no idea that was even a thing.
Here's one that's a little more accessible.
Photo scavenger hunts! Let the kids take pictures and everyone has to guess what they are. Creative, simple, and a fun way to get a fresh perspective on the same old house.
Alternatively if you're more of a hands on person, grab yourself some hot sauce.
There are endless options, but shuffleboard is a good place to start. It’s good for about 5 minutes of entertainment.
We're in love with the image that came out of this suggestion.
It’s collage time and kids get buckwild when they get to create their own collages. That tiger head is powerful.
Or, on the other hand.
Just cry. Don’t look for hacks. You’re in quarantine. Cry.
It's a legal requirement that we end with something wholesome.
And this parent making their baby smile fits the bill. Too cute!
Or there's this sweet family band idea.
PLEASE let them post a video when they’ve finished, this sounds truly delightful. I wonder if I can make my cats do this with me?
Of course there's plenty of people out there who don't have kids...
So what better time to make some babies than when you’re stuck at home with your special someone?
Mr. Rogers said that when there's a crisis you should look for the helpers.
We are not doing that. Let’s be honest: coronavirus has made us all a little bit crazy, and few places have seen as much of it as supermarkets. These poor grocery workers had to get in the middle of a fist-fight over toilet paper.
You'd think it wouldn't be that common for people to get into physical altercations over TP.
But you would be wrong because there’s going to be a LOT of toilet paper fights in this list. People love to wipe their butts.
It's gotten so wild that some places have had to institute security.
No seriously. Those are actual cops guarding actual toilet paper. That is how bonkers the world has gone.
If anyone comes after me like this I'm dropping the TP and running.
I do not want to hear this scream ever again. People have gone bananas.
At least the internet is having some fun with it.
Because even when fists aren’t flying people are going buckwild panic buying. It’s like Black Friday every day of the week.
You can literally watch someone rip toilet paper out of another person's hands in this video.
How much are you all pooping? Because if you need that much TP you have problems other than the coronavirus.
In some places it's starting before people even get into the store.
People are lining up outside stores before open, trying to get in and snag some precious paper products. Was this what we imagined the Apocalypse would look like?
People don't seem to have any thought for the impact they're making.
Have we all turned into apes? Do we not know how to take things off of shelves without spilling everywhere? Were we not raised by mothers who said “clean up after yourselves,”?
But the people who truly boggle the mind are the ones who aren't just fighting to get supplies...
They’re the ones who are hoarding the supplies. These people can’t even fit all their toilet paper into their car. Are they making toilet paper children to keep them company?
But there is some humor in the situation.
No matter how bad it gets none of us will ever be crazy enough to buy “carrot and butter bean” soup. When that happens we know the world is over.
It's not just toilet paper either.
This gentleman has decided he needs enough bread to fuel a small army. Of course 90% of it is going to go bad before he can eat it, but that’s not what’s important. What’s important is that he’s surrounded by carbs.
Some people aren't satisfied with hoarding one thing.
This is all mine and no one else can have any of it. No I will not use all of it. You still cannot have it.
Sometimes you can't really appreciate a situation until you see it in full.
Which is why this aerial view of people mobbing a store as it opens is truly overwhelming. I would not want to be one of the employees opening that door.
And if you think that's not scary enough...
Not all the panic buying is happening in supermarkets. This line is for a gun store. Yeah…people are afraid they’ll have to fight for access to food and TP.
Apparently people aren't afraid to use those guns.
Sure it’s wild when people get into fights at the grocery, but it’s downright terrifying that we’ve already reached the stage of people committing armed robbery to get toilet paper.
If you need a trolley built for furniture to load your toilet paper...
You may not be thinking in your right mind. Seriously. Stop and put it back.
It's not always the customers. Sometimes the staff get a little goofy too.
Look closely and when you see it you’ll know.
Of course all of us know that being close to other people can be dangerous right now.
Which is why dressing like a Marvel superhero undercover is the only solution. This will clearly keep you safe! Hoodies are medically approved. They’re not. Stay six feet away from people.
Here's another option...
She might be joking, but it’s not the worst idea ever. Definitely better than hoodie man.
How are there this many people who are so stupid?
Do they truly have no idea how much toilet paper they go through on a regular basis? Or maybe they’re just preparing for their quarantine diets of frozen pizzzas.
At least these folks aren't fighting...yet.
Honestly, I’d rather starve to death than wait in line that long. This is putting Disneyworld to shame.
Even when things stay calm and collected it still looks so weird.
Imagine this happening in the paper products aisle and emptiness in the produce section. Calm down everyone.
At least food supplies make more sense than toilet paper.
But how do you expect this to pan out? You never get off the rice, she never stops grabbing the rice? It’s a rice standoff.
On the other hand, these folks are definitely getting a workout.
I don’t even think I could lift two of these bags at once, so kudos to this fear-powered strength.
Some groceries have found ways to make things a bit lighter.
You can only have two rolls of toilet paper, but you do get a complimentary mariachi band. I’m not sure if that’s the music I would have chosen as “soothing” but it’s still delightful.
Some store employees have gotten a little bit weird too.
They have to deal with the madness somehow, and, much like the Titanic, they will go down with the ship.
The chaos knows no age boundaries.
But honestly I’m rooting for this lady. That’s what canes are truly for.
Where things get even more terrifying is the medicine aisle.
Fun fact: Nyquil will not save you. Staying home will save you.
Question: do people think their taps will be turned off because of COVID?
Because there’s no other explanation for bulk buying water. Pro-tip: you can turn on the faucet and this cool wet stuff comes out and you can drink it. Works well.
If you're out and you see any scenes like these ones...
Make sure you give a little bit of extra love to the employees. They could use it today.